how a mood can change in a day. I'm still kinda malungkut about all of this. but i know i need to move on. there are things that i can never forgive him for, but life goes on. i cant hold that grudge about him. that leads me no where. honestly.
and my feelings have been so distorted lately. i dont know what to think. i dont know how to feel. i, just dont know what to do. this is been going on for too long, that i just want to forget about all of it.
I'm glad he is still here, trying to make up for all the mistakes he has done in the past. but that was his choice. its biting him in the ass right now. i guess i should be thankful tho right? though he did "abandon" us by cheating on my mom, and supposedly having another family. he genuinely cares about us. well, i hope he does? why else would he still stick around. why would he help fix our cars? give us allowance? help around the house problems? if he didnt care about us, he wouldve let us altogether. like i mean, relaly ABANDON us and have no contact with us whatsoever,
am i giving him the benefit of the doubt? ...ithink so
part of me thinks, if he cared about us, i mean REALLY cared about us... why did he have to cheat. Why did he have to leave us? Oh here we go again i need to get over this.
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